As a unequivocal non-believer in any incarnation of the supernatural, and someone with respect for the scientific method of inquiry as a means to establish true things, I have encountered a significant cognitive dissonance. Good research shows that belief in god, attendance of church leads to happier people. And that meditation is a key component of overall health. What's a (not)goddess to do?
For me, belief is not possible, church not an option (it would not lead to a happier me). So, meditation it is. Yet so much meditation is tied up in woo-woo philosophy. So, in my search for a space to hold this meditative need, I have settled on yoga. To get to this space, I have to wade through yogi bullshit I don't believe; adds for cupping and chiropractic on the bulletin board, but worth it for now at least. Mostly what I am after is a different vocabulary - a way to define 'spirituality' that doesn't have any ghosts in it.
The yoga I do is hot yoga - in a 100 degrees+ room - that kicks my ass physically, leaving me time laying very still on a mat in a hot room while everyone else continues the postures.
And as I lay there, I breath. In and out. It is a space for meditation that I can define.
Even an atheist needs a mantra. I have used them before, when I was more open to the power of woo. Now, I use them to focus my thoughts and behavior to help me be more centered in my crazy life.
In last night's session, these are the things that came to my mind. Good to focus on, even when the heat isn't forcing me to the floor.
--
Every breath is my own.
No one else has it.
No one else can do it for me.
My body is my responsibility.
Without respect for that, no other responsibilities can be fulfilled.
Every breath is my own.
Every breath is my own.
No one else gets to say how I use it.
I define my meditation as I define the values of my life.
Every breath is my own.
Lengthen spine, soft shoulders, quiet mind
breath in,
breath out.
Repeat.
--
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If you'll forgive some science fiction.
ReplyDeleteIn the Dune universe, the Bene Gesserit are a sisterhood similar in many ways to an order of nuns who wield immense power. One of their great strengths is control over themselves.
One of the tools they use to achieve this control is the Litany Against Fear.
I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
As secular mantras go, I've found it to be surprisingly useful over the years.
Science fiction is allowed :)
ReplyDeleteMy first internal response to this was that fear wasn't my 'thing' -- that facing my fears wasn't something I needed to do.
I have since realized I am a fraidy cat. More reflection to follow...