“Lean In” is a part of the zeitgeist now. Sheryl Sandberg
coined the term, arguing that part of why women do not achieve parity with men
in the corporate setting is because of a hesitation, resistance to that world. I
think there is truth there – women’s behavior is a product of our gendered
society, and to succeed in a man’s world women need to adopt different
behaviors.
It isn’t a complete answer, and it certainly isn’t the
answer for all women. We don’t all aspire to CEO. Valid criticism of the
argument for leaning in is that she proposes only a change in women’s behavior,
not a call to change the corporate environment. I think this is an issue that
impacts all of us – men and women.
The counterpoint to women leaning in, is the openness in
corporate culture for workers to ‘step back’. All genders. Men especially are
expected to ‘leave it all on the field’ – the default is to lean in. But there
is more to our lives than corporate success. There should be support for men
who choose to pass up a promotion because the cost to their family is not worth
the career gains. The daddy track is a long overdue concept.
We all need to have the option – lean in, step back, lean
in. To step back when your children are young; when your parents are ailing;
when it is just the time in your life for a different balance: it should not be
held against us when we are ready to lean in once more. Yes, your ascent up
whatever ladder you climb will be slowed by this choice, but should not
regress.
Leaning in feels better than ambivalence – whether you lean
in to your office job, or your painting ambitions, or your family obligations.
I vote for whole person lean in, and sometimes that requires stepping back from
things that dominate your energy at the expense of other things you value.
